Most divorcing and separating parents in Illinois agree on far more than they expect to — but almost every case has at least one sticking point. Maybe it’s the holiday schedule. Maybe it’s which school district the kids will attend. Maybe it’s something smaller that has somehow become the argument that won’t die.
The good news: Illinois courts don’t want parents to fight this out in front of a judge, and there’s a path built to keep decisions with the family whenever possible. Here’s how that path often looks, in order.
Step One: Mediation
Under Illinois Supreme Court Rule 905, every judicial circuit in the state is required to have a mediation program available for disputes involving parenting time, decision-making, and related issues. In many circuits, including Cook County, a judge can — and often will — order mediation before allowing a contested parenting issue to go to trial.
Mediation is not therapy, and it’s not a settlement conference run by a judge. It’s a structured conversation with a neutral, trained third party (the mediator) whose only job is to help both parents find common ground. The mediator doesn’t decide anything, doesn’t give legal advice, and doesn’t represent either parent. Most cases resolve in a handful of sessions, typically a few hours each, spread out over a few weeks.
What mediation is good for: schedule logistics, communication ground rules, extracurricular decisions, and most day-to-day disputes where both parents are acting in good faith but simply see things differently. What it’s not designed for: situations involving domestic violence, a serious power imbalance between the parents, or a parent who isn’t negotiating honestly. Courts can and do waive the mediation requirement in those circumstances.
Step Two: Appointment of a Guardian ad Litem or Child Representative
In more contested cases, the court can appoint someone under Section 506 of the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act to represent the child’s interest directly. There are two common versions of this role, and they work differently:
A guardian ad litem acts as an investigator, often called “the eyes and ears of the court.” They interview the child, both parents, and other relevant people (teachers, doctors, therapists), then report to the court with recommendations. They can be called to testify and cross-examined on their findings — and they have no confidentiality obligation to the child, so anything the child tells them can end up in the report.
A child representative functions more like an attorney, advocating for what they determine to be the child’s best interest. They have a confidential relationship with the child similar to attorney-client privilege, and rather than testifying or filing a report, they argue the case in court directly — cross-examining witnesses and making legal arguments like any other lawyer.
Both roles will work with families to try to settle child-related disputes wherever possible.
Either parent can ask the court to appoint one of these roles, or the judge can order it independently. The cost is usually split between the parents, though the court has discretion to allocate it differently based on each parent’s ability to pay. Seeing one of these appointments in a case is often a signal that mediation and parenting coordination haven’t resolved things, and the court wants independent, child-focused input before ruling.
Step Three: The Judge Decides
When matters don’t settle through mediation, or with a guardian ad litem or child representative, the Judge will step in to make decisions.
At this stage, the court will consider the recommendations of its guardian ad litem or advocacy of its child representative and may also look to a custody evaluator to conduct a more in-depth assessment of the family. The judge will hear evidence, consider the statutory best-interest factors under Illinois law, and issue a ruling that both parents are legally bound to follow.
Litigation is slower, more expensive, and less flexible than the earlier steps — the decision is made by someone outside the family, based on a legal standard, not a negotiated compromise. It’s also sometimes necessary, particularly in cases involving safety concerns, entrenched conflict, or a parent who isn’t participating in good faith.
The Bottom Line
Illinois’s process is built in layers for a reason: most disagreements don’t need a judge, and the earlier steps tend to produce outcomes parents can live with because they helped shape them. But knowing which tool fits your situation — and when it’s time to move to the next step — is something worth discussing with your attorney early, before a small disagreement turns into a drawn-out court fight.
If you and your co-parent are stuck on a co-parenting issue, a skilled Beermann LLP attorney can help you figure out the right next step to protect your child’s best interest.
Colleen M. Breems, Partner
For more on Ms. Breems, please visit: www.beermannlaw.com/team/colleen-m-breems.
